


Just Watching Him

by Iamacarrot



Category: Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Cartoon 2018)
Genre: Boat rides, Brotherly Bonding, Brotherly Love, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Inspired by Moana (2016), Introspection, Sibling Bonding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-30
Updated: 2019-01-30
Packaged: 2019-10-19 03:23:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17593676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iamacarrot/pseuds/Iamacarrot
Summary: Turns out, you can learn a lot about someone by just watching how they react to something.





	Just Watching Him

**Author's Note:**

> I was listening to "How Far I'll Go" while writing this. :')

Donatello showed no emotion as he, his baby brother, and his human friend made their way to a closed dock. It was night, but oddly warm, meaning that the water was either freezing cold, or a little over lukewarm. Due to this knowledge, the Softshell had no interest in going in and finding out, calmly stepping onto the boat that April had ushered him and Mikey towards. April's father had informed her about a boat that he'd wanted to gift to her, and she took no time to tell her friends about it. Leo found little to no interest, and Raph had feared that he'd capsize the boat. Mikey was all but ecstatic, and Donnie only went to keep an eye on the little Box Turtle.

Mikey had innocently thought that Donnie was going due to interest, and had started to question when the older had become interested in boats. Donatello simply replied that he hadn't, but had kept his true motives silent, when he saw the slightly disappointed look on his baby brother's face.

"I just came to help you two crazy kids steer." Donnie had playfully assured, rolling his eyes with a smile as he was hugged aggressively.

And that was what led to this. The trio had just gotten past the drop-off, and were calmly floating, the soft wind and the glistening moonlight being the perfect setting for a peaceful read. Which is what Donatello did, considering how nothing else about floating on the water interested him. Mikey, however, was incredibly enamored by the view, eyes sparkling in response to a sight he'd never been introduced to personally.

Up until now.

The night was going well, and April had taken it upon herself to read about how to actually do more than recreationally use the boat, deciding that she should try to learn how to race, or even save people. The silence allowed for this, and it stayed silent for about an hour, before the soft pitter patter of rain started to tap against the glass. This didn't bother either of the teens who were reading inside the dry safety of the cabin in the boat. It didn't seem to bother the younger of the trio, either, who was cherishing the feel of rain against his face. Too long had Michelangelo been cooped up in the sewers, and, as much as he loved his home, he was starting to loathe the feeling of being unable to enjoy the same things the humans could.

Things like this.

Something as simple as even  _watching_ the ocean, with the moon's beautiful reflection creating an aura of peace and brilliance. This was what Mikey wished he could do with his brothers more often. By  _himself_ more often. Seeing the world for what it was- or, at least the parts of the world like this -was all that Mikey really wanted. He was sure that his brothers felt the same, but, even if they did, they never showed it as much as he did. Maybe it was because of Mikey's more emotional state. Either way, that didn't matter right now. What mattered, was the moment. The present. The rain. The ocean. The moon. The sky. It all seemed to be too much.

And Mikey began to cry.

But, they weren't tears of sadness, or anger, or envy, no.

These were tears of joy. The tears that a person would cry during a time that touched their heart in a way that nothing else could. The tears that showed how important such an event was to the person. And the tears that allowed those around them to know about it.

There was nothing like it. To cry tears of joy, was to show to the world who you were, to show what you wished there was more of. And these tears never burned. They never left a horrid taste in your mouth. They never made you feel embarrassed, or ashamed of yourself. They made you feel one with what you've connected to.

And, when these tears of Mikey's mixed with the water in the ocean, streaks of beautiful blue appeared, rippling through, and drawing more tears. All of this was what Mikey wished could be his. All of this was what Mikey wished could be his brothers'. What he wished...

What he wished could be his father's, once more...

That thought brought a new wave of tears, and these tears were not tears of joy. They were tears of sadness. Pure, unforgiving sadness.

No human would willingly allow Mikey and his family to enjoy these things. No human would willingly allow Mikey and his family to fit in. No human would willingly allow Mikey and his family to be themselves, benevolent or otherwise.

"Michael."

Mikey jumped visibly, looking up at his older brother and sniffling, wiping away a trail of tears. No words came from Michelangelo's mouth, as he was afraid that he would end up spewing out too much of what he felt. Which meant that Donnie would be forced to listen to the problems that plagued Mikey.

And everyone in the mutant family, including April, knew how bad Donnie was with emotions, his own or not.

"Michael, talk to me."

The command was but a mere whisper, nearly a scream in comparison to the silence, mind the sound of rain hitting the ocean and the boat.

Mikey sighed, looking out over the ocean, and shaking his head. He didn't want to. He couldn't. He knew how his brothers felt about these feelings of his. They tried with all of their hearts to give him what they could have never had, and that made him feel worse. For them to give out so much of themselves, just to see their baby brother happy? It was a beautiful family gesture, but an unintentional reminder of how...  _not human_ , the boys were.

"Michael,  _please._ I want to help you, but I can't do that if you don't talk to me."

A sob escaped from Michelangelo, and he was pulled into an unexpected hug, drawing out another sob. Small, menial things like this were what comforted Mikey on a normal day. But this was no normal day. What, with the brothers being surrounded by everything that they wish they could have.

"God, Michael, you can't do this to me. If I start, how am I supposed to help you?"

Mikey froze. So, Donnie was feeling the same way right now. Not surprisingly. The genius was just as sensitive to this topic as the rest of his brothers, despite not showing it often. Which led to the family making an interesting discovery.

At first, it was thought that Donatello was the least affected by the subject. Not to say that he wasn't affected at all, but more to say that he was more emotionally stable about it. Mikey, of course, was put at the top of the list, followed by Leo, and Raph, and Donnie. But, when Raph, Leo, and Mikey found their genius brother, curled in a corner, and having the biggest breakdown about the subject that they'd ever seen him have, they all agreed that Donatello surpassed Leo on the list by a long shot.

"I just don't get it." Mikey finally whimpered, sniffling and shaking, tears streaming out of his eyes uncontrollably. "We'll never be one of them, and they hate us because of that. No matter how hard we try, we'll never be able to see as much as we want. We're forced to live in hiding, and it's terrifying..."

Donnie nodded, rubbing soothing circles against Mikey's carapace. No response was needed for that. Those few sentences were enough to explain everything swimming through both of the brothers' minds.

"They'd just do with us like the rest of the animals... wouldn't they?" Mikey asked, the question rhetorical. "Hunt us down, and use us for their sick recreation."

The younger then silenced, and the only sound then was the sound of rain, and the occasional wave. A storm was brewing, and Donnie could tell. Mikey wasn't as focused on the scene as much as he had been, but, even if he was, he probably wouldn't have known. So, Donatello picked his baby brother up, carrying the younger into the cabin, and informing April that they should get back to port.

April nodded, seeing the condition the brothers were in, and knowing that now was not the time for questions.

While the boat moved, Donatello dried his brother off, wiping away Mikey's tears gently, sending a sad smile, and receiving one back. Like a mirrored image.

Mirrored souls. That's what they were. The mirrored souls, of living creatures, who had been hurt more than they could emotionally handle.

And how Donnie wished he could keep himself from feeling such a way. How he wished he could keep his  _family_ from feeling such a way. The basis of his life. The one thing that truly kept him going every morning. If it were something he could control, he would. Donnie knew that Mikey felt the same way. The adorable little worrier.

"We'll be with them some day." Donnie whispered.

"How do you know?" Mikey asked, his voice even softer.

"Because I say so. And I promise." Donnie replied, taking hold of Mikey's hands.

"A promise to keep?"

"Until the end of time."


End file.
